Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Stupid Jokes 101

What do monsters eat? Things
What do monsters drink? Coke, because things go better with Coke!

Me: My dog doesn't have a nose.
They: How does he smell?
Me: Terrible!

Me: My dog doesn't have a tail.
They: How do you know when he's happy?
Me: He stops biting me!

Me: My dog doesn't have a nose.
They: Yeah you said that!

Me: Knock, Knock
They: Who's there?
Me: Cargo
They: Cargo who?
Me: Cargo Beep Beep!

Me: Knock, Knock
They: Who's There?
Me: Boo
They: Boo who?
Me: Ah, quit your crying, they'll be more jokes tomorrow!


Anonymous said...

Yeah, you're really funny, Mr. Funnyman! I bet your mom was so fat that she had to be baptized at Sea World!

He shoots, he scores!

-Don Rickles

Anonymous said...

Here's one for you Croom runners:

Why did the chicken cross the road?
To show the Armadillo it could be done!

He shoots, he scores!


Star said...

My favorite (and the only one I can remember):

Two cannibals were eating a clown. One looks at the other and says, "Does this taste funny to you?"

(I'll admit, I stole that from either Chase or Andy, but I laugh my @$$ off every time I say it!).

Anonymous said...

2 black guys walk into a bar...

-Dean Karnazes

Anonymous said...

My brother Russell, you see.

-Bill Cosby

Anonymous said...

rectum? damn near killed him!!

The Professor

Anonymous said...
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Mr. Matt said...

They: Are you warm from the Sun?
Me: No. I'm Smith from the Times.