Friday, August 1, 2008

Song of the Week: Closest I'll get to MJ!

This one is inspired by yesterday's most excellent post (by the way, that thread is still very much alive) AND by the Harley watcher extraordinaire for my 2 day Universal trip.

I went to make some toast this morning before my little morning jog and noticed that the Harley watcher, had eaten 1/2 loaf of bread and the better part of a jar of peanut butter. Now that's no big deal except, he spent all of let's see ..... 16 hours in house alone with Harley . And I had taken him out to Breakfast Wed. morning. And his mom had took him to lunch on Wed. afternoon. Still despite the brevity of time, and the being taken out for 2 meals in 16 hours he managed to do the following damage, I am NOT making this up! SuperD, could we have done this in such a short time?:
10 Pepsi's (Wild Cherry)
4 Starbucks coolers
.75 Gallon of Ice Cream
1/2 loaf of Bread
1/2 Jar of Peanut Butter
8 Special K bars
6 Quaker Chewy bars
2 Smart Ones Mac and Cheese Dinners
***Late addition****
As I was putting away the groceries just now I noticed:
6 Pop Tarts @ 210 per.
I'm sure the ripples will be felt for weeks as I go to grab something.
Jeez, common courtesy says leave one! WTF?

Karno was taking in 5 - 6 thousand calories a day while running a marathon a day for 50 days, guys that up there is, schmitz, that's like 8,000 calories while watching TV. That's 8,000 calories in 16 hours, not counting the Pancake, egg and bacon breakfast, nor the Burger Fries and Milkshake lunch! You know that's 10,000 (now at least 12 thousand!) Calories in 16 hours! Happily, the cous cous and asparagus leftovers I had in the fridge were still safely stored when I got back.

I have no response to this, but my man Weird Al has one thing to say..... Just EAT IT!

Ok, Well, the young man is 16, and at this point still very lean, personally, I'm going for a run... right now!


superdave524 said...

Well, I remember us drinking a case of Town Club sodas at dad's in a weekend (I also remember that that was the last time he bought a case of Town Club sodas. He was not a happy camper). I remember us wiping out a gallon of icecream on the first day it made it from the store. Teenagers aren't, technically, human. 'Course, it's also possible your dogwatcher had a pal over.

Just me said...

I think you told him "Eat whatever you want." (I was not there, but that's what you said.)

Nothing lost in translation there...

Roger said...

I'm almost sure to put away a dozen beers at the golf course in the morning. But 10 Pepsi's? What's fun about THAT? Kids today baffle me. Power eating junk food, ultra-violent video games, general laziness, why can't they just get stoned and chill like we "used" to do?

AndyMan said...

Roger, I laughed out loud! Hey, at least he wasn't joshing around by flying no planes!

SuperD, see, I knew you'd remember the Town Club incident. And I knew you'd help me realize that yes, it's sick, but not abnormal for a teenage boy.

Just Me, yes, I did say they, but God as my witness, I forgot. I forgot that a kid doesn't think like, "Well, maybe I better leave one or two, don't want to take it all." No, for them it's, "Damn, why didn't he buy more chewy bars, I'll show that old bastid, I'll eat his ice cream."

And I just washed 5 ice cream bowls. When I pig out at least I use the same bowl and and spoon!

Get stoned and chill (I believe that's why the lad was grounded and available to dog sit in the first place) Kidding, kidding (or am I Joshing? you decide)

Star said...

Should I talk with Dean about the importance of a healthy lifestyle? 'Cause clearly he's more than a little whacked in many dfferent areas.

That said, i believe I could polish off the ice cream with no problem :)

AndyMan said...

Star, but I bet you'd wash the bowls and perhaps even clean up the Chocolate syrup which was everywhere!

Arlene said...

Publix has BOGO Quaker Chewy Bars until Wednesday. You can replenish your supply AND save a little money.

I hope that this information is useful.

AndyMan said...

Yeah, and Pop Tarts are Buy One Get One as well. I'm replenishing, course, I could just say Good Bye to Bad Food!

Arlene said...

I wouldn' never know when Har-har is going to need another dog sitter...

superdave524 said...

Where you at?

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